Yesterday an unidentified Iowa woman seems to have predicted that the caucuses would be an unmitigated shitshow and arrived at her precinct with a coping strategy in tow. Unfortunately, she was foiled by gravity.

　　Let this be a warning to voters who have yet to cast their ballots: If you’re bringing booze to the polls, transfer it to a plastic container with a tight fitting lid for maximum protection. The gods seem to have a sick sense of humor when it comes to our elections, so it’s best to be prepared.